Challenging Week!

Kamusta ka!

This is my 2nd week being here in the Philippines on the island of Bohol in Jagna city! The days are going by quickly. I can't believe I've been on my mission for 2 months already. There's so much to say but I don't even know where to begin!

The Philippines of course is nothing like home. And the missionary life is nothing like what I'm used to. Everything is so different and kind of hard to adjust to. The weather here is killing me. It's summer for them right now and the heat is deadly. Their summer is nothing like Idaho's summer. It's really hot and so you sweat... a lot, and I hate sweating! And then you get really sticky and gross. And the life of a missionary is non-stop, so my companion and I are walking all over the place from town to town, literally up and down hills/cliffs; and so all day I'm feeling gross, and hot, and I hate feeling like that. On top of the heat, the living conditions aren't like back home. Instead of showering with a tub, curtain, and shower head, I use a bucket of water and a ladle. So that's really different, and it's kind of hard to shower when using a little ladle to wash yourself. Also, the toilets are different, they don't flush automatically, so you have to fill a bucket with water and dump it into the toilet. And don't get me started on cleaning my clothes. haha. We get to wash them by hand which is kind of hard to do. You have to soak your clothes in water for a while, then soak them in soapy water, and then scrub them hard in between your knuckles to get out all of the dirt. My knuckles always hurt after I'm done.

It's also really different being here because the people of the Philippines are all dark and so whenever they see a light-skinned woman in their country, they are mesmerized and just stare. So it's really weird walking down the street and having everyone stare at you because back at home, that never happened. Not only do they stare, but some of the guys try to get my attention by catcalling, whistling, or honking at my companion and I. And I just have to remember that I'm a missionary, and shouldn't say anything back.

I've been pretty busy being here in Jagna. My companion and I are teaching 5 or 6 people a day, and we are walking everywhere. One day my companion and I walked for an hour and a half from a member's house to an investigator's. When we left the member's house it was light out, and by the time we got to the investigator's house, it was pitch black. That was probably the longest I've ever walked somewhere before. Sometimes I feel like there's so much to do, so little time. Especially on P-days. There's so many things to do and even though we get to email for 2 hours, the Internet is so slow that it's hard to write everything I want to tell you all!

But I'm just going to quickly tell you all something that happened during this week:

My companion and I worked so hard the other day. We took a bus to another town to visit a member that can't come to church because she's so old and sick. We walked a couple of miles to the sister's house and visited her, and then walked back to the town we lived in (which was a couple of miles). We were both so tired and hungry and just wanted to go home, but Sister Lagan got a feeling that we should visit and talk with Elaine Barbon, a 20 year old that is less active in her family. Sister Lagan told me that she never goes to church, and never gets involved with the missionaries and their lessons when they come over. She also never opens up to the Sister missionaries about why she never comes to church, and doesn't talk to them about her life. When we got to her house and I introduced mysel; she was really hesitant to talk to us. We opened up with a prayer where I prayed for her, and then Sister Lagan started talking with her and asked her why she hasn't been coming to church; but she wasn't really answering the question. So Sister Lagan shared a scripture verse from The Book of Mormon. She then turned to me and wanted to me to share something. I was a little hesitant at first because I didn't know what to say. So I just shared a story about myself before I came on a mission. I told Elaine that I hated going to church because I felt lost, lonely, and insecure. I didn't have anyone to socialize with, and I was scared to put myself out there. So I would either skip church and not go at all, or I would go but I wasn't really "there." I wouldn't go to church because I felt that I didn't belong, and why go if you don't belong or other people don't want you there, right? But then I realized that I should be going to church for myself, God, and Jesus, not other people. And once I started going for myself so I could come closer to God and Christ, I was happier and enjoyed being there. And because I was happier and tried to go even if I didn't have anyone, God saw that I was trying, and He blessed me with people to socialize with. So then it was easier to go to church because I didn't feel so alone. I had the Lord, and members that were there for me. I told her that we should go to church for ourselves and the Lord, not for other people, and once you do that, the Lord will bless you and will make your life 10 times easier.Not knowing her situation beforehand, I opened up and told her a little bit about my life and what I went through. After I shared, Sister Lagan turned to her and asked if she would like to open up and tell us why she isn't coming to church. It took a while for her to begin telling us, but once she opened her mouth, tears started flowing from her eyes. She just cried and cried and slowly started to tell us. The reason why she didn't come to church is because she hated her appearance. She hated her teeth, so she was scared to go to church and talk with people, and have them make fun of her. We told Elaine that she is absolutely beautiful, inside and out. And the Lord thinks she's beautiful inside and out. She is a daughter of God, and because of that, she is beautiful. Sister Lagan then committed her to come to church next Sunday and sit with us, and she said, "Yes!" Missionary life is hard, and sometimes I feel like giving up and going home; either to my home in the Philippines or home in Idaho. But I know that if I give up and go home, I'm not only giving up on myself, but I'm giving up on the Filippinos, and the Lord. If Sister Lagan and I had given in to ourselves and gone home because we were tired and hungry, we wouldn't have been able to visit Elaine and help her. She wasn't ready to talk to the other missionaries, but she was ready to talk to us. The Lord prepared her for us, and if we hadn't listened to the promptings of the Spirit and shared our message and love with her, she might not have ever opened up to the missionaries and want to come back to church.

Even though I'm always so tired, hot, sweaty, sore, have people stare at me, don't have investigators keeping their commitments, and I sometimes feel like going home because I miss my family so much, I was sent here for a reason. The Lord knows our strengths, and He knows our weaknesses. He will make our weaknesses stronger. And I know that when we have fallen to our knees and can't go on any further, He will be there to lift us up on our feet and carry us.

I know that the Lord is there for us no matter what. He wants us to come unto Him and fully convert ourselves to Him. We must do all we can on this earth to prepare ourselves so we can return back to Him. Just hold fast to the iron rod. Kaya ninyo! (You all can do it!)

Gihigugma kita!

-Sister Johnson <3